For most of us, the holidays are a time to gather with family. Perhaps we’re flying to see our parents across the country. Or we’re one of a gaggle of cousins gathering at Grandma’s house. Or we’re driving to spend a few days with an adult child and their spouse. No matter who it is, we hope for warmth, good food, fellowship, and fond memories to cherish.
But there are definitions of family that extend well beyond biological connections. Our “chosen family,” made up of any group of people who intentionally choose to love and support one another, is no less important. Across Patchwork Central’s programming, we build a community that highlights these kinds of chosen connections.
In the morning, our guests, staff, and volunteers share more than just a cup of coffee, some grocery bags of food, and some conversation. Together they are a community of people who care about one another, connect over food and conversation, work together to meet everyone’s needs, and build a place where they can all belong.
In the afternoon, families bring their children to participate in the Arts & Smarts Program knowing that they won’t be one in a crowd of youth but will instead be surrounded by a community of adults and other children who support each other’s unique interests, listen to one another’s stories, and work to grow together. Some of these parents even experienced this loving community back when they were children, which is why they value it so much now.
Like family, we all learn about life from one another and grow through our relationships. There is a lot of laughter, joy, and pride when things are going well, but there are also failures when anyone—staff, volunteer, guest, participant—reacts to a challenging situation in a way they regret. In this, our chosen Patchwork family is just like families everywhere.
Take, for instance, Mr. Mike, who brought his birthday cake to share with everyone one morning. He lived alone and had found friends here at Patchwork, and he wanted to share his birthday with his friends. Or there’s Shawn who brings her dog Roxie with her as a fuzzy presence amid the stress and chaos Shawn sometimes faces staffing our main office. Roxie’s joy and calm spreads beyond Shawn as multiple guests give Roxie pats and scritches and protectively bar her from eating the crumbs off the floor to help keep her healthy.
Then there are the days that don’t run smoothly. Mornings when, for example, John finds himself struggling to stay composed as three people need to talk to him at once about health issues or a mess left in the shower or lack of coffee cups. In those moments, it is difficult to be truly present and caring in every situation and, as most of us would, John’s responses may get terse. Noticing this, Eugene, a neighbor and morning regular, will turn to John and reassure him, “John, you’ll be ok.” In his turn, Eugene regularly asks us to reassure him that he’s a good person and that he meets one of the many definitions of normal.
Or the morning when a group of regulars mobilized to help an extremely drunk man sitting on the steps of the Patchwork tower. Concerned, they began by calling Nurse John to check his vitals. Once John checked him, the group asked how they could help, brought coffee, helped the man walk into the warmth of the building, and kept an eye on him as he drank more coffee and water. They empathized. Things really weren’t going well for him. They cared.
Your donation to Patchwork is an investment in this place and this chosen family. It allows us to continue to be here for one another through both the good moments and the challenging ones. The services we provide are unique, but dovetail with those of our community partners.
Supporting family—whether biological or chosen family—creates a better world for everyone. We thank you for being here with us.
Be well,
Amy Rich
Co-Director, Patchwork Central
